Be Careful What You Click On

When one doesn’t have health insurance or has a large deductible
or large family or lives in a foreign country, one must turn to on-line
research for health issues. So, when faced with yet another yeast
infection, I decided to hell with the gynecologist, the creams, the
pills, etc and I went to all the homeopathic and holistic sites that
Google could provide me with. I read a lot of ads and scams. I
signed up for one site that promised a free e-book on how to beat
yeast infections for good. It also came with a free LOSER sign to
stamp across my forehead.

My free e-book consisted of shit that WE ALL KNOW.
Wear cotton underwear. Don’t douche. Don’t use the creams and
stuff that Massengill tries to tell you will take care of that “not so
fresh feeling” and don’t use scented tampons or pads. Duh, duh,
duh and duh. I haven’t had a period since 2001 so I have no need
for tampons or pads anyway. I watch the Doctors on t.v. so I
know all about how the “vagina is a self-cleaning oven” and how
douching just kills all the good bacteria and leaves you susceptible
to the bad. The good doctor does NOT tell you how the creams
will do the same. Then the e-book continued to suggest changes
to my diet and how all of this free information will cause a change
and stop my yeast infections dead in their tracks in as soon as
12 hours.

I’m such a sucker. Now every time I open my email inbox, I have
an email from someone I’ve never heard of with a subject line in
ginormous letters saying, “WATCH OUT! OVER THE COUNTER
MEDICATIONS CAN MAKE YOUR YEAST INFECTION
WORSE!” or “LEARN HOW JILL GOT IMMEDIATE RELIEF
FROM YEAST INFECTIONS.” Trouble is each time I get one
of these messages it’s from a different sender. Oh well. Point, click,
delete.

Now I just have to be sure and keep the kids out of the room when
I check my email. No reason to educate them on this matter at such
a young age. I’m still searching for the truth in the fight against yeast
infections. And if I ever come across it I can guarantee you that I’m
not going to be one of those opportunistic bitches who will share
that information with the rest of her sister sufferers…for a nominal
fee. I’m going to blog, broadcast and advertise that relief for FREE.
Because that’s what REAL sisters do!

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